Words that are Poison

Words kill; words give life. They're either poison, or fruit - you choose.

What does this proverb have to do with a primary classroom? I didn't know the answer at first but knew I needed to post the proverb on the bulletin board. I needed a visible reminder that my words have a powerful effect for good and for bad - it's my choice how I react and what I will choose to say.

This week alone, I have referred to this proverb four times (and it's only Tuesday). When gossip is being passed around, right in the middle of work time, it's time to stop and evaluate what's happening. When verbal put-downs are handed out continually on the playground and feelings are hurt, it's time to stop the pattern. When written words, "You are a failure." are posted on a worksheet, it's time to redefine peer feedback. When threats of revenge are spoken undercover to keep things a secret, it's time to expose and stop the poison.

What if that's what you've heard all your life, put-downs, knock-downs and negativity? Do you even have the positives inside to pass on? I'm starting to realize that unless I invest my positive works into the hearts of my students, they will have nothing to counteract destructive family patterns. If I can't believe in them and communicate effectively, how will they ever discover what good fruit tastes like.

Today I kept asking if the words I was hearing were poison or fruit? I'm afraid many know the poison because of the pain they've felt in their short lives. I'm not so certain some of them are familiar with the healthy fruit variety. My job continues to be to model the juicy, sweet fruit that can fill your mind with goodness and make you desirous of more; words that make you feel special, valued and treasured.

If I can consciously do this as part of my job at school, what about at home? Are the absence of uplifting words as destructive as the negative ones? I'll be asking that question for awhile as I explore how to communicate better with my family.