Who's the CEO around here?


Mom was moved to a lovely palliative care room right beside the elevator.  The nurses wondered if there was some confusion....the angry words.....confusion about time.....saying that her mind was swirling. We hoped for a better day to come.

Yesterday I spent the afternoon, listening to stories, to dreams, to the ideas swirling in her head,  feeling privileged  to jot down some of her words. We started telling this story to visitors stopping by.

She was angry about the move, how the flowers were left behind on the window sill, how her things were not in the same place, how she couldn't reach the call bell.  She took it out on the nurses, even though they were taking care of details as fast as they could.  Most of her time that day, she said, was spent working on words for the hospital CEO.  She wanted to give him a piece of her mind, venting about how things were being run around the place.

In her minds eye, he was sitting in HER office; she in a big chair of power, him in a smaller one.  As she spilled out her well prepared speech, she saw him shrink bit by bit,  She felt empowered, feeling pretty smug and powerful at his reaction.  By the time she finished with him, he was very small, sitting in silence with his head bowed down.

Later, she saw him look up, noticing his face as if for the first time.  It was Jesus absorbing her words as if they had been physical blows. She was shocked at this sudden change in perspective.  With eyes full of love and sadness, he spoke.  "I'm the CEO of everything."

The smugness instantly fell away, replaced by remorse and sadness.  Tears fell as she told of the picture suddenly changing, of her feelings and thoughts.  This was no longer something funny to laugh about.

She realized the many times she has complained, composing words in her mind, yet zipping her lips and feeling okay with that.  If Jesus is CEO over everything, maybe it's time for all of us to stand back and accept things as he is deciding they will be.


Comments

Kaye said…
Powerful !! At first, I was thinking " good for her, he ( not He ) needs to hear those things from the patients, so he knows people are not happy with all the changes that continue to be made-etc. , etc., etc. THEN, "Wham" Down off my high horse and humbled , as I needed to be. Your mom, being Mary, teaching and loving. Thank You for sharing !!
November 29, 2014 at 5:46 PM
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